Just because someone’s not “for you” or doesn’t feel like “your people” doesn’t mean you need to cut them out of your life — although, it’s possible that might be the very boundary you need to set.
It’s simply to be aware of how you show up in relationships and how you feel in response to your relationships.
10 Ways to Know if They’re Not for You
They’re not your people if…
- they perceive your authenticity as a threat instead of a gift
- they can’t handle your differences in belief, opinion, or choice
- they use shame or guilt to manipulate you into changing
- you feel emotionally, physically, or mentally exhausted after being with them
- you constantly second-guess yourself around them or in response to them
- your connection is primarily built on drama, gossip, problems, problem-solving, or fear
- they can’t hold space for your emotions or emotional expression without making it about them
- they don’t celebrate your wins with you
- they consistently find ways to steer conversation and attention back to themselves and their issues
- they’re threatened and defensive when your share your feelings or needs in the relationship
I hope this episode supports you as you make conscious choices about your relationships and as you seek to be a healthy, functional, supportive, and healing partner, friend, spouse, etc!
